I'll admit that I am a complainer when it comes to Winter weather. If it weren't for family, I would definitely say, "Peace out, Ohio!" and head down South. This winter has been so long and, at times, completely miserable. Cabin fever hit an all time high a week ago. When it finally reached above 15 degrees, I said "enough's enough" and we ventured outside into Narnia. Willow was absolutely captivated by the snow. Winter could stay forever and she would be the happiest baby. She didn't even mind falling on her little bum every time she tried to take a few steps. To my sweet daughter, Winter is magical. And like so many times before, she has reminded me that I can always catch little glimpses of beauty in everything.
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
If you know me at all, then you know I have always wanted to be a mother. Growing up, I was obsessed with my little brothers. I would hug, kiss, and pinch their cheeks all day, no matter how many times they shoved me and said, "Get away, Wiv!" I loved my stuffed animals and baby dolls, one time I stayed up all night making sure each of my stuffed animals had equal cuddle time. When asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I almost always responded, "A mommy" (sometimes I would say "a dentist"...what 6-year-old wants to be a dentist?) I would see moms and their babies at the grocery store and dream of the day that I got to spend the day running errands with my little ones. I was (and still am) someone who totally could see themselves having 5 kids. I have just always wanted to be a mom more than anything.
Monday, December 9, 2013
(First off, apologies for this post being all jumbled up with a few rambling thoughts...I haven't done this in a while.)
Bethel Music's album, Without Words, has been on repeat in our home for a little while. It is the perfect background music to praying, reading, cleaning, and even playing with Tinkerbell. ;) For a while there, I suppose my lips and fingers had gone along with the album. I didn't intentionally choose to step away from writing here. It just slowly happened. For one thing, my MacBook is broken. The screen has to be at a certain angle to stay on, which is super annoying when writing a blog post! Summer came and went, and I started posting less and less, always telling myself I would write something "tomorrow night". My last post was about Willow's first birthday in August. Since then, I feel like life has just been a crazy whirlwind. (She's not so much of a baby as she is a toddler these days: running around, dancing, and learning new words. I feel like one minute I was rocking my chubby newborn to sleep, and the next I look over and she is pulling my clothes out of the drawer and trying them on in the mirror. She is only 16-months-old, but I swear she has the personality of a 16-year-old.) I don't mean that Willow is the reason that I haven't posted, especially since I know so many bloggers who are mothers and make time once a day (sometimes even twice!) to write. It's not even that I don't have the time to do it...I do. Part of the reason I stopped posting was out of fear. I wrote, then deleted. Then I wrote again and almost published, but instead I just closed the laptop. I worried that no one would want to read what I had to say, or that worse...someone would read and then totally hate everything I wrote. I worried that what I had to say wasn't meaningful or interesting. So, I just stopped.
But sometimes you just need to do things because God puts a desire in your heart to do so. None of that "I'll do it tomorrow" crap. I want to make a change and live life as a doer. I don't want to just let life move me along with it, that leads to regret. It's time for me to start loving people, and loving them GOOD. Time to be more disciplined with my life so that I can do things that are pleasing and satisfying to God. And it's also time to use my creativity and do things I enjoy. Because when momma is happy, everyone else is too. ;) So I made a big list of things I love that I need to do more of. Blogging is somewhere on that list. When I started blogging, I wrote because I had a desire to write. I wrote because I wanted to remember what I was thinking at that current stage of life. I wrote because I had something to say, something I thought was important. I didn't care who read. I want to write like that again. I've missed blogging and the awesome community that comes with it. I love my readers and the people I've met through this little space. I miss curling up on the couch and taking the time to sit back and write out my thoughts. So here I am, back to blogging. Nice to see ya again. :)
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
When I was 7 months pregnant, a woman at Kinko's who was there with her 14-month-old said to me, "You better start planning your baby's first birthday party now, you'll be amazed at how quickly it'll be here!" In my pregnant bliss, I laughed and said, "Oh, I've got plenty of time!" She was right. Willow's birthday celebration came and went, and it has now been about a week since my little baby turned one.
So here is a little glimpse of that big day, Willow's Enchanted Woodland Birthday...aka, we threw a party near the woods and strung some lights! It was perfect for our girl, surrounded by lots of friends and family with good food and perfect weather.
My mom made a little fairy house for the girls to play with, and they absolutely loved it! I'm pretty sure they were over by that house the entire night! It was super sweet.
I made a pretty fern and butterfly crown for Willow to wear as we sung "Happy Birthday". It did not fly, neither did the singing part. She was absolutely terrified! As soon as she tasted her cake she was happy though, haha! She was even sweet enough to share a few bites with mommy and daddy. What a silly little stinker!
After Willow went to bed, we had a bon fire and s'mores to end the night. It was such a great party! We were incredibly blessed to have our family and friends there with us to celebrate one amazing year of Willow's life. She is one lucky little girl to have so many people love and care for her!
Monday, August 26, 2013
I never imagined that just one year could change my life the way this past year has. God has completely transformed who I am for the better through this little baby. I was selfish and completely focused on what my next move would be and how every decision would affect myself and my future. (Being married has changed that too, but not in the way becoming a mother has.) The first few months were ridiculous. I was stressed out, exhausted, and had no idea what I was doing. I remember Jared and I trying to get Willow to sleep in the middle of my parent's living room, while the TV was on with at least five people in the room...how dumb!? Obviously she wasn't going to nap there! I was so terrified of letting her out of my sight, even for a nap! I wrote down how long and how often she breastfed, and also kept a tally sheet of her diapers. Dear Lord! You are laughing. I was bonkers, and totally admit it...at least I know! However, no matter how hard she cried, or how little she slept, we still loved and cared for her. I've never known unconditional love like I do now. Becoming a mother has opened my eyes to how deeply God loves us. I have this epiphany literally every time I rock Willow to sleep. I can mess up a thousand times, get angry, cry, and run away from him, but He'll love me no matter what. God is so, so good. He knew I needed to become Willow's mom when I was 23. I've always wanted to be a mommy, just not exactly so soon. Jared and I had a plan that we would wait at least three years after marriage, own a house, and have a bunch of money saved before we had kids. Well, we've been married for two and a half years, live in an apartment, and have a tough time paying the bills each month. But God gave us our hearts' desire, and He has perfect timing. Willow has been the most perfect blessing in our lives. We needed her sweet spirit. She's only one, but we can already tell that she lives up to her name. Graceful, gentle, peaceful, and sensitive...that's our little girl.
So, a final monthly Willow post...
This past year, Willow has:
-Grown to be 31 inches tall, and 21 pounds. That's ten inches, and fourteen pounds in one year!
-Her hair is a light reddish-brown, and the hair on the back of her head is curly and longer than the rest of the hair on her head...a curly mullet.
-She has a total of four teeth, with two more on their way.
-She crawls with determination, and is so very close to walking. Cruising around along furniture and walls, and can stand on her own for quite some time.
-She sings, "Ahhhh", so pretty.
-Willow says "Mama" when she is sad, and randomly says, "Dada" and "Baby".
-Today, she started saying, "Mooooo" when asked "What does a cow say?"
-She knows where her belly is, and loves her belly button.
-Her feet are incredibly chubby marshmallows that are always barefoot because she hates wearing socks and can't fit into shoes...we're working on that one!
-She isn't the biggest fan of food. She will eat mostly anything, but loses interest very quickly. Blueberries are her favorite, she'll never turn them down!
-Willow gives kisses on my cheek and her babydoll's cheek, no one else's.
-She loves the tub and swimming in the pool...little fish.
-She still sucks both thumbs, which are now callused.
-She hates loud noises, especially the vacuum, which makes it impossible to clean the floors.
-She loves her uncles, aunts, grandparents, and cousins a lot!
-Her favorite thing in the world is when Daddy comes home from work.
-She has stolen our hearts, and is growing into the most beautiful girl.
Here we come, toddler years!
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Yesterday we went to one of my favorite places growing up, White House Fruit Farm. As a kid, I went on plenty of field trips here to the orchard, and our family would pick out our pumpkins in the Fall. It always felt like it was hours away when I was little, but it's only five minutes down the road from where we live now! Funny how everything seems like a big deal when you're 7. The weather was perfect, so we decided to pack up the stroller and head on over. The very best part of White House are their homemade donuts...especially blueberry. They are incredibly delicious, like melt in your mouth, you never could imagine a donut could be this good kind of delicious. Willow had her first bite, and loved it. That's my girl! We love White House, it's one of the yummiest little treasures in our little town.
I love taking Willow to my favorite places around town. Although I have been there a million times, being there with my sweet daughter makes everything seem new. Honestly, she even makes going to the grocery store fun!